hey

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i moved.

update!

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daddy's car has the best music in the world! ang palaging laman ng kanyang player: NORAH JONES. i love norah jones. oh i really love her music grabeeeeeh. r e l a x i n g ! ! !

i can't choose a favorite among her songs coz all are really good. but there's this one song that's stuck in my head. let me post the lyrics, kasi grabe ka-relaxing talaga and aylavet! C= the title of the song is Rosie's Lullaby.

she walked by the ocean,
and waited for a star,
to carry her away.

feelin' so small,
at the bottom of the world,
lookin' up to God.

she tries to take deep breaths,
to smell the salty sea,
as it moves over her feet.

the water pulls so strong,
and no-one is around,
and the moon is looking down.

sayin',
rosie - come with me,
close your eyes - and dream.

the big ships are rollin',
and lightnin' up the night,
and she calls out, but they just pass her by.

the waves are crashin',
but not making a sound,
just mouthing along.

sayin',
rosie - come with me,
close your eyes and dream,
close your eyes and dream,
close your eyes and dream.

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went to UP mindanao today for the biolympics. it was so much fun, hahaha. C= lapok kaayo kay ulan man. pero sus, go pa rin ang games. C= palarong pinoy today. sa next sundays pa yung ball games, etc. i enjoyed the place. i enjoyed watching and playing the games. first time ko ring pumunta somewhere... basta, haha, kami yun ni ate gypsie. kawawa na kasi mga urinary bladder namin. hekhek.

so basically, nag motorcade kami sa morning from ateneo to UPmin (sa likod kami ng pick-up weeeee), nag games stuffies until the afternoon, then umuwi na. hehe. hinatid ako ni mabu (mali ang grammar!) sa house. kahapon din. weee. C= la lang. maka-happy. hehehe.

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btw, i already watched One More Chance! wahaha. sayang yun, kasi dapat 5 pairs kami mag watch. rachelle and geo, maya and kuya jetter, jewel and kuya arj, toni and paolo, me and mabu. kaso mabu had to cancel at the last minute coz something urgent came up. so yun. but i loved the night nonetheless. C= although we were lugi (we paid for premiere seats but ended up sitting just two rows from the screen... errr), worth it pa rin. =P despite having to deal with stiff necks after, we enjoyed the movie. C=

it made us cry! yung mga girls lang ha... i think. =P

so yun... MANOOD NA KAYO. =P hahaha.

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gotta go now.
aral...
aral...
aral...
zzz...

at last, a plan

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sometimes i wonder what truly makes me happy. these days, i often find myself sad and helpless because i can't do the things i want to (oh please don't give me a sermon about being spoiled and all. please, not now).

and so, in order to start putting an end to this depression thing (which nobody seems to understand), i'll make a list of what i want to do/achieve and how i could achieve them:

1. learn how to drive → ask daddy to teach me for the rest of the semestral break. if i don't learn, i'll enroll into a driving school this christmas break.
2. have higher grades → thankfully, i've found the main solution to my problem with low grades: CAFFEINE. and, yeah, less Y!M/friendster/multiply time.
   
3. get rid of my dermatitis → sadly, it's already part of my system, probably forever (but hopefully not!). so really, i dunno what i'll do with it... probably just continue medication? and (*sigh*) continue avoiding all the food that i'm not allowed to eat. whooo. kaya ko 'to!
4. give decent christmas gifts to family and friends → i've already started working on this one. i've been saving moolah for christmas. hopefully i'll have enough to spend when shopping time comes.
5. lose weight → this one's really difficult, considering the fact that i'm not allowed to perspire... shet. so maybe, what i can do is just to get rid of all snack times.
6. stop being hard-headed → just... stop.
7. spend more time on music → be more active in the choir...? hmm...
8. spend more quality time with mabu → finish school stuff early so that i'll have extra time.

good luck to me.
God bless me on this.

flowers

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photo i took while walking alone around our subdivision yesterday

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bakit ganito ang life? today masaya, tomorrow malungkot, tapos masaya na naman, tapos malungkot na naman... hindi ba pwedeng palaging masaya?

i know, ganito talaga ang life. and once malalampasan mo ang mga challenges, napakasarap ng feeling. it's just that it sucks talaga kapag nasa struggling stage ka pa lang. nakakatempt bumitiw, pero alam mong hindi pwedeng bumitiw. lucky ka kung may natitira ka pang sanity sa utak mo.

actually, i was supposed to write an open letter to God here. first time ko yang gagawin [sana] sa blog na ito. pero as i let my fingers type whatever just comes to my mind, naku, eto ang lumabas. madramang entry. madrama at malabo.

ewan ko nga ba kung bakit ganito ang natype ko. ewan ko rin kung bakit malungkot ako ngayon. nakakainis yung times na naiinis ako sa sarili ko dahil naiinis ako. gets? yun yung mga times na hindi dapat ako naiinis pero naiinis ako at dahil naiinis ako eh mas lalo akong naiinis. syet.

isa pang example ng cycle na annoying: nagkakaroon ako ng rashes dahil stressed ako tapos lalo akong nasestress kapag may rashes ako. you know what that means: more rashes. ARRGH. para matigil ang progression, nagtetake na lang ako ng gamot. hahai. don't worry, hindi naman ito pinagbabawal na gamot. kaso, hindi rin OTC. sana naman mawala na ang skin asthma ko... este, atopic at seborrheic dermatitis pala. (sayang naman ang pag-undergo ko ng biopsy kung hindi ko gagamitin yung medical terms.) (gumasto ako para sa biopsy para lang malaman ang sakit ko.)

so, nagyawyaw na talaga ako. hehehe. ewan ko ba. gusto kong bumalik na lang sa kahapon. ang saya ng araw ko kahapon. ang saya... bakit kaya? hehe... C=

sa ngayon, kailangan kong mag-empake. hindi ako maglalayas ha. may kailangan akong puntahan. di ko alam kung dapat ba akong ma-excite or whatever. ang akin lang is, honestly, may doubts ako about going. my body is too tired and (actually) sick. pero kailangan kong pumunta. so ang prayer ko na lang ngayon is sana masaya ang growth session... growth session ng choir namin.

about choirs... nami-miss ko na ang pagkanta. i love music. but lately, it seems to hate me. ewan ko lang ha. i just need to be happy. yun naman ang palagi kong issue eh (nang hindi ko sinasadya). (meaning, hindi ko ginagawang issue pero lumalabas lang palagi na yun ang issue ko: gusto kong maging masaya palagi.) ewan ko nga ba. kaya nga ganyan ang description ng blog ko eh...

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i miss you...

can't think of a title

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omg, i can't believe it! makakatulog na ako nang maayos. hahaha. these past few nights, grabe ang puyat ko. i've been studying a lot and doing my requirements diligently. oha! =P crammed nga lang yung iba, pero what i'm happy about is that inspired ako maxado mag-aral these past few days and nights. so far, i've accomplished everything that i have to accomplish.

starting tonight, makakatulog na ako nang maayos dahil tapos na lahat ng exams ko sa majors ko. woohoo! filipino, theology, and political science exams na lang. wiheee. C= ang saya!

this afternoon, i went out with some friends. we watched a movie lang, actually. i was with mabu, josie, arvin, and kuya arj. grabe ka-funny kasi we watched resident evil tapos yung mga uyab (mabu and arvin) ang natatakot at nagugulat sa movie. nyahaha. di ko na sabihin yung details kasi baka magalit si uyab... hihi. basta, parang nabaliktad ata. yung girls ang parang boys, tapos yeah, you get the point. hehehe.

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my cousins + tito and tita left for canada last saturday morning. awww. i'm gonna miss them. it's only been two days and i can't wait to see them again. O_o



i miss you so much...

rant, rant, rant

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shit. so this is how it feels. this is how it feels to be so tired, to have your relatives leave for canada (for good) in a few days, to have at least 5 major exams within the week, to have a very annoying allergy attack, to have asthma, to have low grades, to not have my laptop with me starting tomorrow until i don't know when... ugh. this sucks.

crying doesn't seem to make it better.

i guess i just have to start working. that's all i can do to make things a little better.

God please help me. extend my patience...

fly me to the moon

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fly me to the moon,
away from it all.
fly me to where
my tears won't fall.

fly me to the moon,
fly me to the sky.
take me away
do it now, i pray.

'coz here on earth,
life is tough.
and some people just don't get it
when enough is enough.

fly me to the moon
and make me feel loved.
wrap your arms around me
and don't ever let go.

baby, on the moon
we'll make our own world.
in it, we'll be happy
there'll be no need to worry.

fly me to the moon
tonight as i sleep.
aboard a heart-shaped balloon,
let's start our long trip.

thanks to maya for the photo

update after 48 years

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mabu and i had an achievement tonight. i got to meet some of his relatives. C= wiheee... kilig! hahaha. i'm honestly so glad that it went well (dapat lang, di ba!?). it was my first time to attend one of their parties with relatives. it was so... cool. C= hehehe. ang bait ng people and one of mabu's uncles was like, "para kang si kim chiu. uiii... kim and gerald!" hahaha.

i got to converse with some of them. i also got to watch a couple of episodes of one tree hill. nyahaha. i got to eat yummy food (i miss caldereta!). i got to take home some new urc products (hehe thank you tita!). i had a couple of kilig moments. ♥ and, uhh, i had one embarrassing moment... shet. =P it's a good thing that only carlo, tarmi, and eric (i think) heard what i said... hahaha. according to tarmi, my face turned red. umaygas, sobrang nahiya kasi ako... =P

being the weird person that i am, i will make kwento my embarrassing moment: i accidentally called carlo "dad"! omg! it was so embarrassing! parang... yaks! hahaha. i really, really do not know why i said that. sobrang it just came out of nowhere! O_o first time ko gud xa matawag na ganun. in front of his siblings pa talaga (and relatives, who *hopefully* didn't hear). hahaha. shucks. kakahiya!

but then again, just as i said earlier, grabe ko ka-happy dahil sa lahat ng nangyari tonight... ♥
labu mabu! C=

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superduper grabe ko ka-busy sa school these days. tsk, tsk. my brain hurts almost all the time. hahaha. taxonomy and embryology (plus others, of course) are currently taking up much of my energy. x_x grabe nung thursday sa taxo. we were given a 2-chapter long test and right after that, our group had a 2-chapter report. i was amazed by how mabu and i got to understand and explain all the concepts despite the fact that our preparation time was grabe ka-ikli. hehehe. maka-happy! C= another thing pa pala na pinagkakabusyhan ko sa school is peer consulting. i am currently an applicant and one of the requirements is mag-duty sa guidance office. hihihi, malapit ko nang matapos i-render yung required number of hours ko per sem. ang saya. C=

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kaso, xempre, life isn't perfect. there are times jud na grabe ko ka-inis or galit sa world. and there was one day this week when i felt like the world hated me. oh well, i guess ganyan talaga ang buhay. sana lang maka-isip na ako ng solution about my recurring problem. badtrip kasi talaga. tsk.

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pero despite all the problems i have right now, i can still declare these two statements to the world:
life is good. <3
God is good. <3

desperados

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my blood pressure rose because of all the tears that never fell.
----------{@

sad

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i am bored and hurt and very sad and deeply sorry and missing somebody and worried and feeling guilty.

sheeeeeeeeeesh.

add to that my allergy attack and the tons of schoolwork i must finish today (a rest day) and tomorrow (a holiday).

i just want to sleeeeep and wake up into a BEAUTIFUL and CAREFREE day.

new template!

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i got bored with the old one. so here's another template, though it's also custom. i won't even change the color scheme. html makes my head hurt. i am not pro in html and am not planning to become so. simple as it may be, i still love my blog design. heck, i'd probably love anything that's pink. and yes, in many instances, simplicity is beauty.

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everything happens for a reason. sometimes, things fall apart just so other things can fall into place. but in the end, what's meant to be will find its way.
-a text message i received from ate rhea today

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ADVANCED HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DADDY! ☺

tsk, tsk. tomorrow, i'll surely be eating out with my parents and brother again. all the pounds that i lost in the past week will be gained back. hahaha. oh well.

drowning in love

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i see trees of green, red roses too
i see them bloom for me and you
and i think to myself, what a wonderful world.

i see skies of blue and clouds of white
the bright blessed day, the dark sacred night
and i think to myself, what a wonderful world.

the colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky
are also on the faces of people going by
i see friends shaking hands, saying how do you do
they're really saying i love you.

i hear babies crying, i watch them grow
they'll learn much more than i'll never know
and i think to myself, what a wonderful world
yes i think to myself, what a wonderful world.

-what a wonderful world by louis armstrong

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what a wonderful world this is! shet. hahaha. ang sayaaaaaaaaaaaaa ng buhay. C= nalulunod na ako sa love. mabu, nalulunod na talaga ako. ♥

sobrang na-feel ko ang love today, especially kay carlo pati sa mom ko. ang sarap ng feeling na alam mong may naga-care sa iyo. pati xempre, ang sarap ding mag-care para sa kanila. wiheee. grabe bonding namin ni carlo sa mall this afternoon tapos si mommy na naman ka-bond ko sa house pagka-night. maka-happy lang talaga to be with the people you love. C=

another thing na maka-happy is the ateneo fiesta. wahaha, saba kaayo ang students ganina. sakit kaayo sa eardrums pero lipay kaayo ui. ma-feel jud nimo ang energy rush. intense. nyahaha.

plus may isa pang naka-pahappy sa akin today. rush hour 3. grabe tawa namin. hahaha. twice talaga namin pinanood sa theatre. tapos nung second time, tawa pa rin kami. lingaw kaayo. wiheee. happy.

plus... meron pa talagang ibang reason. i lost weight! hahaha. konte lang naman. hindi ko masasabing payat na ako. pero pumayat ako. wiheee. nakaka-inspire to lose more weight. pero sige lang. kontrolado ko na itong diet program ko this time. i won't starve myself.

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so yun... gusto ko lang i-share ang happiness ko sa world. wiheee. C=

HAPPY, SHALALALA! ♥

hindi ako tamad. hindi ako tamad. hindi ako tamad.

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what's happening to the world? everybody's working so hard in school! waah! feel ko ako na lang ang natitirang tamad na nilalang sa mundong ito. syet.

am i normal? hahaha. di ko talaga alam kung bakit tamad ako. shucks. kinahanglan na jud nako magbinugas! nagatuon man ko ba pero dili jud as in kanang todo. gina-make sure nako nga naa pa koy panahon para sa ubang butang. dili lang baya academics ang akoang gina-prioritize.

inya ki din aya! injak matarusan ti sarilik. nagpudot ti ulok tono eskwela ti pagstoryaan.

hehehe. naghihingalo na ang aking ilocano tongue.

the point is... sobrang restless ako. at sobrang tamad ako. at sobrang nagwo-worry ako kasi parang lahat ng tao sa paligid ko eh nag-aaral palagi. ako, minsan lang. x_x peste. kelangan ko na talagang mag-aral. huhu...

♫

mabu, i have a huge crush on you.
brayt ka kasi maxado, mabu.
i love you, mabu.
♥

diary

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i was going through my first year second sem diary a while ago and read my entries dated february 12 and 21. for some weird reason, reading them and remembering how i felt on those days made me want to cry. kahilakon ko karon, actually. i'm very happy but kinda worried at the same time. happy ko kay ma-connect man gud nako ang mga events katong time na to ug karon. nya it's difficult to believe that many of my wishes have come true. naks. love jud ko ni God. hihi. salamat kaayo, as in. C=

ask and you shall receive;
seek and you shall find;
knock and the door shall be opened to you.
-matthew 7:7

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belated happy birthday to my lolo. C=

first storm

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whew! last night was a rough one. after a few days of EXTREME happiness, a problem arose and i was in the middle of everything. i am in the middle of everything.

surprisingly, i am not depressed. this is probably because i know i can function a lot better if i stay strong. thank God, i am doing fine. honestly, i was on the brink of breaking down last night when i was talking to three people at the same time, trying to figure out what to say to each. shet, ang hirap nun. i survived. we survived. we will survive. naks! hihihi.

i have a weird new way of coping with issues such as this one. i study. hahaha. mag-aaral na ako ng embryology in a little while. yahoo! after i read one chapter of my book, it would be one problem down for me.

so basically, thankful lang talaga ako kay God for giving us strength in dealing with this crisis. pray lang talaga ako for guidance.

i love you, friends!
labu, mabu!

happy happy joy joy

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i don't feel like updating my blog... i'm too happy... hahaha. basta. i just have to change my latest entry.

I'M SOOO HHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYY!!! ♥

yun lang. hihi.

sana happy rin kayo! C=

i feel...

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insulted. unhappy. disappointed. guilty. sad. helpless.